How to Spot Anti-Realists

An anti-realist, or solipsist, believes that nothing outside of their own mind exists. This is a stupid mindset, and one that you should seek to stop.

*WARNING*

The following techniques can be dangerous, be sure to wear proper safety equipment (such as earplugs) when confronting a solipsist.

How to Recognize a Solipsist:

1. If they EVER tell you that you do not exist.
2. If they ramble on about "perception" and the meaning of "reality" as if they believe it is actually important, or interesting.
3. When someone insults them, they revert to an extreme level of smugness. In most cases, you will actually be able to smell the smugness. Take precautions, as those with allergies or breathing problems may succumb.
4. They may trip strangers for kicks.
5. They offer people red pills and a chance to "wake up".

Actual anti-realist quotes:

• "The glass is however full that I godamn want it to be, all right?"
• "Mmmhmmmm" (the sound they make while looking in a mirror)
• "I had the weirdest dream last night guys; and guess what, you were ALL in it!"

Defensive Strategies:

• If you are ever cornered by a solipsist first try to surprise them. If you do something truly random and unpredictable it will completely shift their world view. Don't be shocked if their ears start to bleed.
• Slap them.
• Point out the obvious flaws in their argument. (note that this is also considered an offense strategy, more of those will be covered in my next post: How to Hunt Anti-Realists)

Please report all confirmed solipsist sightings to the proper authorities or below as a comment. Thanks for helping make the world a safer place.